REALationships
All things relational.
Have you ever wondered how the past impacts your relationships now? Why relationships become toxic? Why you chose the ‘wrong’ partner (time and time again!)? Why relationships are so difficult at times? How to begin to get your needs met?
The REALationships programme is an eight-week exploration of ‘all things relational’ combining theory and experience, education and discovery, challenge and personal development to provide a comprehensive insight into how relationships work (or don’t work), how to avoid them becoming toxic or abusive and how to nurture and develop relationships going forward.
Georgia’s story
Georgia attended Iceni after being recommended by a friend when domestic violence in her relationship became something she knew needed support with in order to protect herself and her children. There was increased alcohol use in the home and her partner was struggling with mental health issues. She reached out for support for both of them and her partner attended the Venta programme. She was first greeted by Simon who was welcoming and listened to her concerns.
How did we help?
During the next two years she attended the freedom programme (which has now been revised by Iceni and replaced with Boudica), Triple P, and the REALationships group which she describes as “the best ever, amazing. Glenn is awesome. You are able to focus on yourself and that’s where we all need to start.” She spoke of how she realised she needed to worry about herself first and this was a space she could do this. She also had one-to-one counselling. She attended acupuncture with Jo after her sessions. “After dealing with raw stuff and it can be intense… lots of thought power… acupuncture just balances you.”
The staff were friendly, caring, listened but most importantly the building and the team felt safe. Georgia uses the phrase “it takes a village to raise a kid, well, Iceni is the village”. She was able to vent without judgment in the knowledge her words were being held safely.
Outcomes
Georgia took responsibility for her own well-being, and began writing her memories and feelings down. This writing therapy helped her with her own healing.
When we asked how Georgia’s home life had changed, she replied simply “Iceni saved my life”. It was life-changing because she finally felt heard, understood and this sense of relief gave her confidence to make appropriate for her relationship and her family. Iceni took her concerns seriously and she was believed. Things felt like they were changing for the better and this was because of the sense of Iceni advocating for her, supporting her like they were ‘on her team’. “We don’t choose these circumstances for ourselves, but Iceni were always available to go to meetings with me… Iceni was an absolute rock”. Iceni supported Georgia with emotional support and encouragement for meetings with social workers and police.
Impact
After a turbulent couple of years, Georgia and her family had their last family therapy session and then continued her life without Iceni support. Her key worker implemented a clear exit strategy which was important for Georgia’s safety. “I know Iceni is always here. I’m always valued if I need them the village is still here. Always, as soon as I need them… What they do should be worldwide. They helped me find courage and strength and I found my voice.”